Faraway Yet So Close
by An Eye for an Eye 99
Summary: Jane makes decisions in her life that lead to the better and to the worst. She goes through battles that may lead her straight to death. Can one Maura Isles save her? Help her get back what she has lost. *First Fanfic, please be kind :) * This is kind of a slow burn to Rizzles, so please bear with me.
1. Chapter 1

_**"One never reaches home," she said. "But where paths that have an affinity for each other intersect, the whole world looks like home, for a time."**_

_**~Hermann Hesse**_

* * *

The day was cloudy but the sun was shining bright. So bright it hurt her eyes. She could stop staring at it but she did not. It had been too long since she's seen the sun in such a simple yet striking setting.

The sight was beautiful and familiar as she looked at the other surroundings.

Fast cars. And stopped cars filled with angry people in a traffic jam.

_Just like it used to be_, she thought looking up.

A gasp escaped her lips and an overwhelming joy filled her heart at the view.

Building's high made of mostly glass windows. And building's low made of brick.

She had missed it for nearly ten years. And now she was back.

And in her hometown. But not home. Not yet.

* * *

"Michelle, stop jumping on the bed and sit down."

Demanded the little girl's mother.

The blonde haired beauty sat down properly obeying her parent.

"Sorry, mommy."

The mother took out clothes from the dresser's drawers where the televison sat and put them in a worndown suitcase even though there weren't many.

Looking to her daughter once again she sighed.

"When we get out of this hotel and get a house you'll get your own bedroom and a big bed for yourself."

The five year old gasped quietly in awe. And lowered her voice as if she were telling a forbidden secret.

"With princess covers?"

The mother nodded with a pround smile on her face.

"Yes and you my angel can jump all you want on that bed."

Michelle furrowed her eyebrows. Worry and doubt etched onto her face.

"I promise baby." She answered with conviction.

Michelle clapped her hands and lightly bounced up and down while staying in her spot.

She smiled widely to where her cresent shaped dimples formed.

The woman stood up from the floor with a grunt.

"Now mommy's got to go to the bathroom. Can you be good?"

The five year old's chocolate brown doe eyes widen and a serious expression replaced the previously excited one. She put her hand dutifully upon her chest.

"Yes mommy I cross my heart that I will."

The woman smiled in appreciation and walked across the room to the bathroom.

Giving her daughter a funny playful look in the process.

Michelle giggled heartily at her mother as she walked away.

* * *

Entering and closing the door, she locked it. Never turning the light on.

A heavy sigh filled the dark space.

She had not seen her face since she had been attacked.

A wallowing feeling of agony fills her chest and forms a lump in her throat.

"Just get it over with." She whispers sorely.

Gathering up courage she straightens her posture.

_Here you go..._

The woman turned on the light and quickly spun to face the mirror.

Slowly she touched her face with her long fingers.

"No..." She murmured looking at her reflection. Her shoulders shook and soon her whole body as she took in what she seen in the mirror.

Hallow brown eyes filled with grief.

Pale skin with patched bruises on the left side of the cheek.

And a deep cut on the forehead, that was sutured.

It stretched from her hairline to the corner top of her right eyebrow.

"This can't be me." She whispered with disbelief as tears took over her vision.

_This can't be me_, she thought.

But it was.

She was Jane Rizzoli.

* * *

A/N: Let me know your thoughts :)


	2. Chapter 2

_**"A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing."**_

_**~George Bernard Shaw**_

* * *

Darkness enveloped Jane's vision as she stared wide-eyed at the ceiling.

Just thinking.

Thinking about what was next.

Where would she and Michelle go?

They couldn't stay there any longer. Jane knew it was only a matter of time before the hotel staff members or even manager call her out for overstaying her welcome. That's why she packed their bags.

They'd been there for at least five days with a two day pay. Jane was just waiting for them to knock on the door.

Sighing, the brunette shifted in bed to face her daughter who was soundly asleep.

Her expression was one that was serene and angelic.

Jane lightly took her finger and trailed it over Michelle's soft ivory colored cheek.

A small smile cracked on the brunette's face.

Michelle was Casey's child but she could easily pass as Maura's just with Jane's brown eyes.

She had Maura's hair. And Maura's skin, intelligence, curiosity and quirkiness. Michelle loved the color pink and was polite as can be that Jane sometimes wondered if she was really her child.

Michelle was so innocent and filled with imagination. She'd make up fairytales at the end of each day by replaying the days event into a version of fantasy consumed with unicorns, dragons, princesses, marshmallow forest and gumdrops. And no matter what happened everyday the setting stayed in the marshmallow forest.

Jane absolutely adored and nurtured her baby.

It saddened the mother that her daughter had to go through being abandoned by her father which she didn't know fairly well in the first place and then be given a father figure who turns into an abusive bastard and having to leave because of it.

Now she has a beaten mother who can't find a decent job to get a stable home. And going from hotel to hotel wasn't good for the five year old. She needed normalcy. Michelle would question about what they were doing and where they were going. Jane would always reply the same, 'An adventure, we are going on an adventure.' And it wasn't a lie. They were on an adventure. An adventure filled with being homeless with few clothes and close to no money at all.

Jane pulled the silk blankets more snugged against her and Michelle so now her daughter was nestled into her body and Jane's head lay above hers.

The brunette brushed her fingers through the little blonde's shoulder length curls in a soothing rhythm earning a content sigh from the five year old.

Jane was now looking straight out of the same and only window that she was earlier.

It was storming outside and thundering loudly. Jane was curious as to how Michelle could sleep through it. She'd be used to loud noise anyhow...but still.

The brunette's eyes were trapped to the window. Rain pounded ferociously against the glass as if it were a million fist and it's mission were to break it into shards.

Lightning flashed suddenly causing Jane to clench her daughter tighter in her arms.

How could such a beautiful day turn into a nightmare when a black sheet covers the sky?

Easily.

And Jane hated that. How a good thing could turn into hell. Like her life. But the only thing keeping her going was her child.

Michelle was the light in the pained soulless void.

Jane never wanted to give up on her child. And she never would. She wanted the best for Michelle. And Jane wanted to accomplish that on her own.

She wanted to get a big house for her and Michelle. She wanted to buy Michelle all the pink clothing she wanted.

Jane wanted to get her daughter her big bed with princess covers.

But she didn't realize what was holding her back. It was buried deep inside her mind and locked into a chest of passive resistance.

She just didn't want to accept the one thing that would be the first step into achieving those acts.

Help.

She needed help. Jane needed help.

And little did she know that'd it would be coming rather sooner than later.

In an inconceivable manner.

* * *

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews, favorites and follows. I am fairly grateful. Keep reading and letting me know your thoughts. They are important to me :)


	3. Chapter 3

_**"The world is so unpredictable. Things happen suddenly, unexpectedly. We want to feel we are in control of our own existence. In some ways we are, in some ways we're not. We are ruled by the forces of chance and coincidence."**_

_**~Paul Auster**_

* * *

Boston's air was an arctic cold, the usual around this time of year. Even though it looked like the sun was shining didn't mean it had any effect on it's bitter weather.

Walking the streets of Boston, Jane couldn't help but feel agitated and worried.

Michelle and herself hadn't ate any proper food in two days or showered.

And the brunette didn't like the looks getting sent her way.

Maybe she was just being self-conscious. Maybe they weren't paying any attention to them at all.

She looked at her daughter.

They are all definitely looking at us.

Frowning the brunette examined Michelle.

Who wouldn't stare incredulously at a little girl with messed hair, no gloves and just a blue jean jacket on to keep her warm.

Jane glanced down at her own clothing.

No better, she thought while grimacing at her attire.

A gust of wind blew furiously against the brunette's face causing her hair to flow across her face.

She hastily swept it behind her ears.

Once more Jane looked to her daughter.

Her tiny shoulders sagged and her face was contorted into a pout.

"What's wrong baby?"

"I'm hungry mommy."

Letting go of a shaky sigh the brunette bit her lip.

"I know baby girl."

Both continued to walk as Jane contemplated where to go for some food. She had no money left. So all she had was the hope of a restaurants leftovers.

Unless she went back.

Oh god he's gonna kill me...

The brunette made a decision.

"Were gonna go to Sulley's house," Jane tugged her daughter's hand to get her attention. Michelle looked up.

"Remember Sulley?"

The little blonde nodded as she rubbed her eyes with the palm of her hand that was free from Jane's grasp.

She yawned.

"Tired baby?"

Michelle nodded in response.

Taking a big breath Jane adjusted the bag on her shoulder then reached down and picked up the five year old with ease.

Michelle clutched onto her mother tightly as they reached the sidewalk from the crossing.

Jane bumped into an heavy elderly man. He was at least six feet tall.

She gasped and stuttered an apology,

"I-I'm so s-sorry sir."

He tilted his hat in an acceptance of the apology. Grinding his teeth on a toothpick he chuckled heartily.

Had she seen him before?

"No problem young lady. Have a nice day."

Jane tilted her head.

"Yeah, you too, sir."

She stared at him until her walked further down the street into the crowds to where she couldn't spot him anymore.

"Momma?"

I had to have seen him before.

"Yes baby girl?"

"Why did you stop?"

The little blonde twisted a piece of Jane's raven hair between her fingers.

"I..." Jane held on tighter to Michelle.

"I thought I knew him."

She started walking again.

Michelle was still enraptured with the locks of her mother's hair.

"Your hair has gotten longer."

"I know, your hair has too."

Michelle nuzzled her face into the crook of Jane's neck as another gust of wind blew.

"I'm cold mommy." She coughed.

"I know baby."

Jane crossed the street once more as she seen the place she'd been searching for.

* * *

"Long time no see, Rizzoli."

Jane smiled at the older man's taunt.

"Hey Sulley." She hugged him, put the bag on the floor and moved Michelle onto her upper body more.

The gray haired man put the broom he had against the wooden wall.

He took a look at her and his face contorted into sadness.

An expression Jane hated to see from the man.

His hand went through his full nearly white hair. Sulley took a deep breath.

"I thought you had it all together." Shaking his head slightly he crossed his arms.

She shrugged, "It seems that I don't. That's why I'm here."

He lifted his eyebrows in question,

Jane sighed and gestured to the couch by the wall, he nodded in consent and she walked over then gently laid Michelle on it. Sulley opened the hall closet and came back with a woolen blanket. He unfolded it and covered Michelle in it's warmth.

The man gestured for the brunette to follow him and she did.

They went into the kitchen. The chair creaked as Jane sat down on it at the table.

He took out two mugs from the cupboard and poured fresh coffee into each.

Sulley sat down and slid the mug to his friend.

She sighed in content when the heat emancipated from the cup to her hands.

"Rough year."

Jane took a sip, "Most definitely."

"Michelle can't be in this weather. It's a killer, you know that." His gruff voice sounded loud in her ears.

She tapped her fingers on the cracked wooden table.

"I know but I can't ask them for anything."

Sulley frowned.

"Who said I wanted you to ask them anything?"

Jane gave a look of amused disbelief.

"Every since I came to Boston you've been on my case about my family and how they're doin' now. You think I don't know you want me to have some type of family reunion with them?"

He leaned back in his chair making the legs creak.

Sulley folded his fingers into an intertwined fist.

"You need to do what's right for Michelle. I bet she doesn't even know her grandma, or uncles let alone Maura, huh?"

Jane didn't answer.

"What about Casey?"

She sighed, "He left when she was born. You know that."

"Yeah I know. I'm just tryin' to get you to see that this baby girl doesn't even know Casey. She doesn't know her family, Jane and it'll do real good for her to know them."

"We had a family."

"What family?"

"Eric and me."

He frowned and sat up, putting his elbows on the platform.

"Her so called daddy not her real father. He was an abusive punk and don't you dare start defending him."

The brunette brushed her fingers through her hair.

"I'm not it's just that's the only father she knew. I couldn't let her know Casey just left. She's five and she's smart. All she knows now is that Eric did some bad things to mommy and he's goin' on a vacation to fix himself. I...didn't know what else to tell her."

Sulley sighed.

"Don't tell her. At this young in age anyway. Especially about the drugs."

She held up her hand.

"Don't start."

"What?! I know that's what you spent half your money on. Why hide it..."

She glared at him.

"I'm not doing it now so it doesn't matter. Stop talking about it."

"She know-"

"No!"

Jane looked behind her to make sure she hadn't woken Michelle up.

When she felt that she was still asleep Jane lowered her voice.

"No, she doesn't know and never will. Now please drop it."

Picking up his mug he took a swig. She did the same.

Drugs. What a horrible topic. Jane didn't even like the thought of her really using half the money he gave her on drugs but it was true. She still didn't want it being said.

Michelle. Michelle would never know of this. She's too innocent. Like Maura. Innocent.

"She looks like Maura." Jane said barely in a whisper.

"Hmm?" He questioned.

"I said she looks like Maura."

Sulley grunted, "She does doesn't she? Yep. The hair, manners, skin and all."

Jane nodded, "Yeah."

Silence sat in and Jane didn't know what else to say because she was dazed in thoughts. What would it have been like if Maura in their lives...

Jane had a picture in her head of the honey blonde in a sundress walking in the park with Michelle running after her.

The scene was completely serene that the brunette urged for that moment to be true so much.

"-and you can get a job there then work your way up."

Jane snapped out of her daze and looked at the older man in confusion.

"You didn't hear a word I just said did you?"

Sulley had a smirk on his face and she blushed red of embarrassment.

"Sorry, no...what were you saying?"

He shook his head, "I was sayin' that you two can go live with Rose, Catherine's ole friend from the planetarium she used to work at."

She scoffed, "I will not stay with some lady whose a friend of Casey's mother. No, never, zilch, nada."

Sulley tilted his head.

"Yes you will. I'm sick of this little macho pride you got goin' around but you need help one way or another. I will resort to tellin' miss Catherine."

"You wouldn't-

"Would. She will listen to me if I say to take the child away from you Jane. And I don't want to do that but I will. She is practically my granddaughter...or would have been step granddaughter if Cathy and I hadn't got divorced early on. But anyhow I will do it. I won't hesitate."

Jane was shocked. Sulley would never do that. Oh but he would, Jane realized. Anyone would.

I need to get it together...

The brunette bit her bottom lip and gripped the sides of the mug tighter.

"Okay, I'll stay with her."

"Good," He smiled, "She'll get you a job at the bakery that she owns so you can work your way up while paying her off. I'll make sure of it."

Her eyebrows rose.

"Thanks, Sulley."

He smiled in welcome.

"Let me call her and tell her your on your way."

Jane frowned, "What now? Wait you had this planned?"

"No, she takes in people. Rose has a big house that was once a group home. No more groups or nothin'. It'll just be you and Michelle."

"I am not the needy."

Sulley stood, stretched then yawned.

He picked up his mug.

"Well doll, right now you're considered just that."


End file.
